Monday, June 4, 2007

pet advice from zymurgian

If i ever won the lottery or something, the first thing I would purchase would be a very small dinosaur. Not too cumbersome or voracious. If I had a pet dinosaur, I would keep him in my backyard, which would inevitably render him furious , with great gnashing of feet and crashing of fangs.
He's a good enough pet dinosaur. I named him "Noam".
Noam the Dinosaur's favorite snacks are:
sneakers on the urban trail
children on the urban trail, wearing sneakers.
the occasional SUV
Actually, I haven't told you guys the whole story... You see, Noam is female, and she just gave birth to a cute-ass dinobaby. Thing is, Noam never got knocked up. Far as i know, she is the only dinosaur in Flagstaff. My pet had an immaculate conception!
Now I have two pet dinosaurs to feed. This means many more saunterings to the urban trail and along I40 very late at night. But hey, they don't bark much.

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