Wednesday, January 4, 2012

The President on Mars

If you've been reading this blog for any length of time (which I thoroughly appreciate, by the way) you know that I really love a good conspiracy theory. And this has to be one of the best I've ever read:

Two former participants in the CIA’s Mars visitation program of the early 1980’s have confirmed that U.S. President Barack H. Obama was enrolled in their Mars training class in 1980 and was among the young Americans from the program who they later encountered on the Martian surface after reaching Mars via “jump room.”

Andrew D. Basiago, 50, a lawyer in Washington State who served in DARPA’s time travel program Project Pegasus in the 1970’s, and fellow chrononaut William B. Stillings, 44, who was tapped by the Mars program for his technical genius, have publicly confirmed that Obama was enrolled in their Mars training class in 1980 and that each later encountered Obama during visits to rudimentary U.S. facilities on Mars that took place from 1981 to 1983.

You really owe it to yourself to go read the whole thing. Perhaps my favorite part:

On August 21, 2011, Mr. Basiago stated: "Something highly significant has happened, and that is that two individuals from the same Mars training class in 1980 (Basiago and Stillings) have met and are comparing experiences and are able to corroborate not only that they were on the surface of Mars together but that before reaching Mars via jump room they were trained with a group of teenagers that included the current President of the United States (Obama) and director of DARPA (Dugan)."

Mr. Basiago states that during one of his trips to Mars via “jump room” that took place from 1981 to 1983, he was sitting on a wall beneath an arching roof that covered one of the “jump room” facilities as he watched Mr. Obama walk back to the jump room from across the Martian terrain. When Mr. Obama walked past him and Mr. Basiago acknowledged him, Mr. Obama stated, with some sense of fatalism: “Now we’re here!”

The primitive conditions that they encountered on Mars might explain the high level of danger involved. Mr. Basiago and Mr. Stillings agree that Major Dames stated during their training class at The College of the Siskiyous in 1980: “Of the 97,000 individuals that we have thus far sent to Mars, only 7,000 have survived there after five years.” When they then first teleported to Mars in Summer 1981, the young Mars visitors confronted the situation that Major Dames had covered at length during the class the previous summer – that one of their principal concerns on Mars would be to avoid being devoured by one of the predator species on the Martian surface, some of which they would be able to evade, and some of which were impossible to evade if encountered.

So forget the whole Kenyan-Muslim thing. It's clear that our President may be controlled by Martians.
Added: The more I think about this, the more it explains things in my own life. I can't remember much of what happened to me between 1980 and 83. I always thought it was drugs, but now I'm thinking that actually the CIA sent me to Mars, and brainwashed me into thinking that it was drugs. Yup, that would explain a lot.


Fearguth said...

So how many hours a day do you spend,on average, over at

pygalgia said...

Actually, I don't check it very often. Which is odd, cause I usually enjoy it when I do.

zencomix said...

Bonus points: The College of the Siskiyous is in Weed, CA!